ReCap!

Haaaaaaaaaw jeeze...

My parents have dial-up, remember, so I haven't really had the motivation to post anything. Christmas was great... although our send-off from Sellersville wasn't. Wes and I wanted to open present with his parents Christmas morning and then head off to my parents house for Christmas lunch/dinner. Someone had a fit about that idea so we got an "OK BYE" when we left and were told we'd open presents on Sunday, upon our return.

We got to my parents house, had a delicious meal, and opened presents!! My mum got Wes some really nice shirts and a nice sweater, my dad got him a Scottish Ale beer kit. I got my camera (iPod touch I got Christmas eve!!) and a lens and case for it. My sister got a Garmin and Sirius radio, my brother his snowboard.

Friday my friend Kristen came over. She brought her baby! I've known her since second grade and now she has a baby... CA-RAZY!! She and her hubby are moving up to Fort Drum New York so will only be five hours from Williamsport instead of twelve!

Saturday was my mum's family Christmas party. It was good to see everyone. It was good times :) We do a name-pick before Christmas so that everyone only has to buy for one person... which is easier on the wallet. My cousin Michael got me a Hot Topic gift card so that I could by some lip rings... since I always loose the balls. We went to my mum's cousin's holiday party in New York after that... I got sick, my mum was sick... so we left early. Wes drove us home and I threw up as soon as we walked in the door. But I felt much better afterwards :) I slept a lot after that so Wes beat Mario Kart Wii. A couple of times.

Sunday we traveled and I worked Sunday night. Booooooooooooo.

We're going to Rhode Island tonight to spend New Years in Newport!!!!!!!! AWESOME! I miss Sam and Matt :(

*Grumpy Face*

I wanna go home. And I want Wes to come with me. But, of course, it's not going to be that easy. I won't give out credit to anyone. You never know who reads these things.

At least I finally got MY computer back so I don't have to 'delete history' everytime I'm on it.

Sleepy Rambling

Awake at 4am even though I'm not working? Uber stinks. I think my really effed-up schedule of sometimes being at work and sometimes sleeping (or... supposed to be sleeping) at this hour really confuses my body. I'm sorry body, I know. I can't wait until I can cease this daily transition from night-life to day-life to night-life either.

So I had a sandwich and am seriously considering hijacking Mamma Mia! from the downstairs and watching it upstairs before someone more responsible than myself decides to take it back to Blockbuster.

Saturday night at work was awful. Some chick (I won't use the other C-word) got really pissed that we wouldn't let her use our Employee Only restroom so went out back, peed and puked, and then proceeded to brag about it (very loudly). Some plastered idiot dropped a bottle of something and it exploded everywhere. He just watched it as it rolled across the floor, pouring liquid (drunk people and wet floors: not good). So I mopped that up amid a crowd of hungry ass-holes. Some other dood drunkenly backhanded his buddy's coffee... so I had to bring the mop out again and clean that up while "I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" is heard in the background. The fella who had assaulted the coffee was an "emo kid" I guess but... not a kid. He was older so knew that he only needed certain elements of the "emo kid style" to look emo (unlike these kids that just positively ooze emo to make sure onlookers know just how individual they are... PFT!). He told me I had beautiful eyes. Thanks drunken-older-emo-guy-who-actually-pulls-off-"emo"-without-looking-pathetic. He was just flattering me so that I wasn't upset with him when he left. He wanted to walk-out on good terms. This is the relationship I have with drunken WaWa customers.

I worked with Shawn both Friday and Saturday. Two days in a row is too much of that kid. He always proposes these 'hypothetical situations' that I know are legitimate scenario's that he's encountering but he thinks that I'll be more sympathetic or offer him better advice if he builds up this scene with me as the main character. Yet, he'll tell anyone that he had a something-something-breakdown and has lost all faith in people (people being girls) and sees a psychiatrist regularly (even though he already knows what the Doc tells him to be true: You can't change people). All he talks about are girls: how he's given up girls, about the cute girls that come into work, why he's attracted to such-and-such a girl even though she's not his 'type,' how he was supposed to hang out with this girl but she keeps blowing him off ("What should I do!?"... really? You don't know?), girls, girls, girls!!! I just stare at him, eyes glazed, mouth slightly open, dumbfounded by the lack of intelligent conversation. I like Shawn. Just not when I'm stuck at WaWa with him for eight hours. More than one day consecutively.

I can't wait to be moved-on from gosh darn WaWa. So many people are boo-hoo about office jobs but honestly, I'm tired of being treated like shit by scum of the earth and business suits alike. I'm tired of people assuming that I have an IQ equivalent to that of my age and have three kids and a dead-beat boyfriend at home and that this is as far as I'm going in life. Being treated like that really irks me (this is part of the reason I'm uber friendly with "customer service associates" when I'm out and about).

Anywho... My ear is doing well... Minus the fact that Wes attacked it with his nose yesterday. I'm excited to travel home this week and to Rhode Island next week. I'm excited for my fatter paychecks since school has been out. I'm excited to give out presents (and recieve! Kyle got me a Black & Decker Blender!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). I'm happy that Wes is interested in wine (finally!).

I think I will go upstairs and watch Mamma Mia! Who doesn't love a musical this early in the morning?

Petty

I've been having a tough time sleeping lately. I think it's because of my lack of a never-ending list of things to do. I'm too relaxed. I can't sleep when my mind is at ease!!!!

I was driving home from work this morning, past school... and due to the heavy ice we've been getting, a huge branch tore off a tree and right into the brand new fence the school had built earlier this semester. It was kind of a bummer to see because I watched that innocent little fence go up... and it had quite a violent end. It wasn't fair to the fence.

Wes and Jim should be on their way home from the Flyers game (7-1, Flyers). Wes thinks he has a new hobby. Typical Wes!

Work tonight. Hopefully to outlet stores tomorrow (my mum expressed a want for some L.L. Bean slippers). Possibly enjoying a bottle of wine with my Wes Sunday evening? Sounds spectacular!

I finished my book last night. So now I have no book to read.

So I'm sitting in the basement, doing laundry, drinking my WaWa coffee, eating my Entenmann's Original Recipe Chocolate Chip Cookies and watching Flight of the Conchords (season one). I just wanna go back to bed and wait til I have to go to work tonight.

and now wesley hates me.

Mom! Dad! I'm Engaged!

I love the show Engaged and Underage (from MTV... who else?). It makes me feel so competant and mature.

These kids think that their 'relationship problems' will be solved if they marry their 17 year-old beau. The girls think their boys won't go out or oogle other women or make dirty jokes with their friends. The boys think they're gonna get some everynight while maintaining their current dood-hanging status. It's cute.

They think it's instant entrance into adult-hood and that their parents will finally take their relationships seriously and begin treating them like adults. Ye gads!!!

It does EVERYTHING!!!

I'm my anticipation of receiving my lovely new iPod Touch (EEEEEEEEEEEE!) I'm browsing the hundreds of apps that you can get to put on it....

So what application has me in fits of excitement? Barely able to contain myself? Well... THE GRAPHING CALCULATOR APPLICATION!!!! DUUUUH!

Is the nerd in me showing??

I can also refresh my French with my iPod Touch... I think I have a new best friend :)

The final tally

Oh, I almost forgot!

Fall Grades 2008:
Honors: A
Speech: A
Physics: A-
Calculus: B+
Microbiology: B+
Philosophy: B
Semester GPA: 3.55 (uuuuuuuuuuuugh)
Cumulative GPA: 3.745 (DOUBLE UUUUUUUUUUUGH)

I really have to step it up next semester and get that cumulative GPA to round up to 3.8 again. UGH UGH UGH UGH. Terrible semester!

Me. Unproductive.

I am not a person that does well when there's nothing to do... I know I'll be busy with work this weekend... but for right now... I'm just blaaaaaah. No classes and no work and no money to spend on entertainment... ACK!

I can't sit and watch T.V. all day. My eyes have been going oogley because of the hours spent reading.

At least when Wes and I lived in our own place last year, I had a house to clean or paint or putz around aimlessly in. Now I have a bed room. A tiny bedroom.

Wes' dad isn't working for the next couple of weeks and apparently his mother took off this whole week. So they're here... all the time. Ackward much?

I know this all sounds a bit complainy and whiney... but the whole thing really just makes me wanna rip my hair out. At least Gene is bringing me Wanted tonight so I'll have something to entertain myself with for a couple of hours tomorrow.

Last night we went to Nate's to hang out and drink homebrew (der!). Extra Special Bitter, Winter Warmer, and an Espresso Porter were the brews of the evening (all extremely delish). We ended up staying way past Nate's bed time (he's an extremely early riser) so I feel rather guilty for that.

It was good times :)

Work tonight... YAY!!! Something to do!

A Good Weekend!

It feels sooooooooooooooooooooooooo good to be done with school... but now I have that feeling of "Oh crap, what do I do with all this free time?" syndrome.

I asked to be put back on as full-time at WaWa... and they gave me three shifts... two of which are Friday and Saturday nights. This pisses me off for two reasons: 1) that's only a $200 paycheck and 2) too much time to sit around by myself during my week and no going-out-time with Wes on the weekend. I want my big-girl job already!

My peircing is all crusty with dried blood and my ear is all black and blue... but it doesn't hurt or throb or irritate me in anyway, so I guess it's fine!

The Christmas party was a blast last night. I adore some of Wes' coworkers. Good food, tons of drinks, and great company! (Oh, and LOTS of dancing)!! Who could ask for a better time?

Piercings are fun!

So I noticed a bulletin from Fyre Body Arts today that tonight they're doing free piercings! You just have to pay for the jewelry! I think I might get the webbing under my tongue done... technically it's called the "tongue frenulum" but if you google-image-search that phrase, a bunch of penises show up :( Icky pants!!

So... check the my photo blog tonight and maybe you'll see a picture of a new hole poked in my face :)

Work tonight... Wes' company Christmas party tomorrow night!!!! WEEEEEE boozing with Wes' co-workers!

So much frustration!!!

oy! The anticipation of waiting for grades to be posted drives me absolutely mad!!

My honors grade isn't up yet even though we gave presentations Monday night and there were probably 12 of us...

My speech grade isn't up yet even though I gave my final speech last Wednesday.

What the heck are these guys waiting for! My physics final was Tuesday morning and that grade was up by Tuesday night!!! AHHHHHHHHH I CAN'T STAND THE ANXIETY!

Micro was much more difficult than I anticipated but I did study hard and I think I'll get an A- there. Calculus wasn't that difficult... but the one problem that I should've known backwards and forwards I couldn't get to work properly. ARG ARG ARG. Just Philosophy left for today... Keegan (and Jamie, I suspect) are going to meet me in the library at 12:30 to study for it. It would be really great to do really well on this test and feel like I've done really well. Although... if I could choose a B for any class it would probably be Philosophy because it's only a 3 credit class, so it is weighted less than Micro or Calc. It looks like it might be A-'s across the board though.

*sigh* The end is so close... I can't imagine how next semester will feel... when I'll be DONE with undergraduate studies!!!!

Philosophy for Thought

Epicurus: If God is willing to prevent evil and can't, then he is impotent. If he is able to prevent evil but doesn't, then he is malevolent. If he is both willing and able, then whence then is evil?

Albert Camus (Atheist/Existentialist): We must recognize evil in all its forms but we must not accept it. Evil is the negative acts that humans can commit - killing, war, genocide, cruelty to others. Human dignity lies in our struggle against evil, to defy it, to reject it, to carry on in the face of it. Look at the world and your own life as absurd. Seeing, sensing, and, ultimately, owning that absurdity leaves two choices: suicide or revolt. Revolt against absurdity gives life a value, suicide gives in to absurdity. Bearing witness to the absurdity of life by revolting against it is the only proper choice in the end.
~Main premis behind The Plague

A minor victory

Physics: A-
OH YEAH!!!

Blah Blah Blah School

I figure it's time for an update... for whomever reads this thing anyway!

I've been kinda bummed about my too-busy-schedule lately and how it's interfered with my blogging (sad... I know.) but I think it's for a strange reason. As far as I know, nobody reads this. And I'm fine with that. I think, what it is that has finally lured me in about blogging, is that I find it very... therapeutic... to just type. I tend to type like I speak... so it's like that best friend who will just listen and listen and listen and never complain. The best friend that you abuse with minor life-victories and unnecessary drama... and they are happy to hear it all. I think that's why I've been irritated about my schedule not allowing me to blog... Like my blog subtitle says, "I have a lot of nonsense on my mind and this is how I choose to get rid of it." It just feels better to vent... to have everything out there *sigh of contentment*

That being said, tonight was my honors presentation. These things are pretty laid back and consisting of x-number of students that deliver 15-25 minute presentations of the category Explore and Enrich... which is a pretty loose category. Tonight we had someone who has been taking belly dancing lessons, two girls that traveled to Utah and worked for animal sanctuary, a girl talking about teaching inner city 8th graders the importance of ecological systems, a young fella that writes music, another that earned his SCUBA diving certification, a fellow-foodie of mine that taught us self-defense amongst other things. All-in-all the presentation took about 4 hours to get through (I know...) but everyone has something semi-interesting to say. Wes and I's beer was highly accepted and received rave reviews.

Tomorrow morning is stupid Physics... then Thursday is Micro, Calc II, and Philosophy... I figured I can get an 80 on Micro and still get an A... unfortunately Physics, Calc, and Phil are not similar. I'm pretty much on the verge of A-B for all of them... I hate being at that point going in to finals. Sucks dick.

On a semi-good note, I took my speech book (never used), my micro book (never used), and one of my two calculus books (because I'm an idiot and bought two) back to the book store for book-buyback. $195. Not too shabby (until you consider the fact that I spent over $600 on them). Well, no... not technically. I still haven't returned my physics book (DID use) and my philosophy book (never used) and my other calculus book... I'll do that Thursday after finals (and before the Porter House... hehehehehehehe).

I'm just excited to be done-ish... and am really bummed about the next 4 finals... Hey! At least next semester won't be this bad :/

OH! And I think Wesley is getting me an iPod touch for Christmas. That is something to look forward to (since I've been music-less while on-the-go since I lost my last iPod :(... )

Dreaming my Life Away

I haven't updated or written anything really interesting the past week... But I've been beat. Flat-out exhausted.

Today I stayed in bed until 5pm. 5!! I was having such lovely dreams (although I can't recall what they were about now) that I didn't get up. Everytime I woke up, I just stayed there and waited for more dreams. It was so... not-dealing-with-this-place. It was lovely.

So... no studying got done, no beer got bottled, nothing productive was accomplished. It really makes me just want to turn right around, go back upstairs, and not think about it. Just dream some more.

ugh

I'm so tired I can't see straight... and it's only 7:45. I can't wait til my 5pm bed time this evening... that's the only thing keeping me going.

Intergrals, heat of fusion, and family fun

Ooooooh gooooooooooooood it pains me to be back at school. The break did rejuvenate me and I was almost excited to learn today... but the tests and the projects and the speeches and the reviews is enough to make one go mad. At least I have my muddy buddy's to keep my happy.

To Do:
Wednesday -
Physics test review (for test Wed)
Physics project (which I haven't started)
Physics final cheat-sheet (an 8x10 piece of paper!!!!)
Philosophy final review sheet
Calculus final review problems
Calculus take-home part of final
Final speech for speech class

Next week -
15 minute presentation on Beer Making for Honors for Monday
Physics final (cumulative) Tuesday
Calculus in-class final (cumulative) Thursday
Copy and study Microbiology notes for final Friday
Make sure to get at least a 95 on Philosophy final, also Thursday. I think.

Doesn't look like I'll get to work much next week which is a major bummer... but I really need to do well on all my finals... ugh ugh triple ugh. It's almost over. It's almost over. It's almost over.

I got a 51 out of 50 on my micro unknown... even though I got the wrong 'answer.' I deduced that my unknown was B. larvae when in fact it was B. cereus which is a lot more dangerous and can make you very, very sick... I wonder if that's why everyone has been so sick around here.... hrm....

Lynette changed her major from Food Science to Food Technology (half way through her senior year) and hopes she can fit in a minor in psychology. Ye gads. Minor's only require 15 credits from that departments specialized courses so it's not that difficult... it's just courses that she hasn't taken into consideration.

Anywho... it sucks to be back in the swing of things. My family may not be perfect (my dad is really out of touch with... everything) but we get along, we laugh, we have good times. My mum loves to have her girls and their boyfriends around and we like to pick on my little brother (he needs some tough love). I finally got up to my aunts house and saw all the renovations they've done to it. It's actually quite a tiny house and nothing super fancy but they've really improved the look of it. My cousin, who is my age, just got hired full-time at Frito Lay (making nearly $20 an hour) driving a forklift and now his dad, who has never done anything spectacular or worth mentioning, is excited to spend his sons new found fortune. I've never cared for my aunts husband... as my mum put it, "He's nice, he's just... stupid." We went to my other aunts house (my mum's other sister) and I got to see the married cousins and one cousin-in-law (the other one was visiting her family in Poland). We played Mario Kart on Wii and ate pie. Good times. Lazy times. But good times.

I've started looking at jobs... and my 'looking' I mean I have a resume on Monster.com. I've actually had it up there for quite a few weeks now and have been getting emails frequently about job openings and hirings... but haven't really seen anything of interest. We shall see... I don't want to be a graduate without a job :( or a least a twinkle of a job... I don't know.

My parents still have dial-up!?!?!?

I know sweet blog! It has been too long! But it's not without reason that I haven't been on a computer for a couple of days.

The plan for this week was for Wes, Kyle, Mike and me to pick Jimmy up at the airport at 11:30 Wednesday night, for me to drive home early Thursday morning so that I could enjoy Turkey Day with my family, and for Wes to make the trip north Friday. It sounds simple so of course a million things went wrong:

Wednesday night started off well enough. Wes, Mike, and I hit up the Wine & Spirits to stock up for the evenings adventures. I got Little Boomey Chardonnay (stupid Perkasie W&S only had Shiraz and Chardonnay in Little Boomey) and I figured a white would go better with Turkey Dinner the next day than the red... so even though I don't care for it, I got the Chardonnay. Wes got his espresso vodka and Mike got Yukon Jack.

When we returned to Wes' parents house, the boys insisted upon a game of shooters and ladders... The shortest drinking game I've ever played. Wes' dad was sipping on some of my chardonnay and his mom was standing to the side, disapproving of our (binge) drinking but laughing hysterically at Mikes antics. Kyle showed up to drive our drunk selves to Philly Airport to pick up Jimmy. Mike mixed some of his Yukon and lime juice (a snakebite, I believe) in a soda bottle for the trip (which I did not approve of). We found Jimmy without problem but on the way back... A cigarette butt that I thought I had flicked out of the window had actually come back inside and sat between my hoodie and Kyle's car seat for a period of time before Kyle says "what's burning!?!?" That's when I felt the warm sport on my back and brushed the cigarette away. I, of course, didn't remember this had happened until I went to put that hoodie on yesterday and my brother goes "There are burn holes all over that!!!" and Kyle calls and says "I know what was burning in my car!"

But I'm getting ahead of myself. I had Kyle drop me off at the house so that the boys could go out and play and I could get to sleep in order to wake up and drive home in the morning. I went to sleep at 1:30am... and woke up at 5am to a terribly squeamish stomach and a still-empty bed next to me. After lying there for a few minutes, I decided that this wasn't just a rumbley stomach... this was what Wes and his dad had been suffering from the week before. So I got up to put clothes on and go do my thing downstairs... and as soon as I stand up, my tummy decides it's time to expel everything. Luckily there is a little garbage can in our room so I run over there and start heaving (pleasant, I know). As I'm there, naked and barfing, who should walk in but a very intoxicated Wesley. I yell "GET OUT GET OUT!" and he backs out unaware of what he's walked in to.

As soon as the heaving stops I throw on some clothes and run the trash downstairs and throw it out, clean up the rim of the can, and grab the mop bucket. I made up a home on the living room couch until about 8am at which point I moved downstairs so as to avoid dealing with people and the smells of thanksgiving dinner being cooked. I texted my mum and said I wasn't able to make the drive. I was actually pretty upset that my stupid body decided to get sick that day. I was glad that I didn't have work or school and could just veg out and recover... but I really had wanted to come home for dinner with my family. So I veg and veg... and throw up and throw up... and finally, around 1pm, Wes wakes up and finds a pathetically ill Em curled up on the basement couch (watching a lot of House!!). He brought me ice and popsicles and bought me lemonade and made me lemonade ice cubes (try them! they're delicious!). I was able to swallow everything without immediately bringing it back up... so around 7 that night we decided to get packed up and make the trip to my parents.

I felt fine lying down on the couch but when I got up and began moving I felt super crummy but we managed to get piggie and clothes and guitar packed and began the trip. I had plastic bags just in case and my stomach was a little lurchy but all-in-all it was a pleasant trip and we made it here a little after 11pm. My mum heated us up stuffing and gravy and potatoes and it was the most delicious Thanksgiving dinner I've ever had.

We saw my Mum and sister off as they headed out to Best Buy around midnight to go stand in line. I think they went just so they could say they did it! I would've gone with them but I had only slept four hours in the last 36 and was exhausted. My mum woke me up Friday morning so that we could take my car to get inspected (a cost that was supposed to have been $50 and turned into $85!!!) and then back home for more sleep. Woke up at 1:30pm when the car place called to say my car was ready but didn't get down there until 3pm or so. I left straight from the car place to go have sushi with Steve. We went to Wegman's which has decent, cheap sushi and I discovered that Wegman's sells beer now! LOTS of beer! I didn't buy any but Steve picked up a 24oz can of Foster's for less than $3!

Wes and I vegged out last night and watched the first two Lord of the Rings movies (because he has never seen them!!!) which took up approximately 370 minutes of our evening. In between movies, we made a trip out for coffee and Wesley's weekly lottery ticket. Turns out he won $15 off his $10 ticket! Hey, if you're not gonna win big, you might as well be happy that you've won more than you spent on the ticket!!

I'm bummed it's Saturday already and that we have to go back to Sellers-stupid-ville tomorrow... but today we're going to my aunt Carol's because I haven't seen her house in forever and they've done a lot to it... and to my aunt Trish's who's a little bizarre and really annoying but is a fantastic cook... and then to my dad's club for dinner tonight (taco's and taco salad!). Hopefully I get to do something with my Brittknee today... I can't believe it's Saturday already! Boo :(

OH! As I was brushing my teeth this morning I realized that I was spitting brown spit. So, naturally, I look at my tongue in the mirror and it's brown! My tongue is brown!!! Talk about icky pants. This really freaked me out because I had just seen a House episode in which some guy had bacteria growing on his tongue and it was this big mystery and what-not. So, naturally, I think I'm going to die. I calmly come down the to computer and open google.com, the answer to all of lifes questions, and search "brown film on tongue." Turns out, it was just a chemical reaction to the pepto bismol chewable tablets I had taken last night!!! phew! After my brush with death, I'm ready for some leftover stuffing in a pool of gravy :)

Boredom to the Max

I have an affinity for lists... lists of all sorts and makes and subjects.

This is my new favorite:

10 GIFTS WE DON'T WANT
1) Life Gem - they take your dead pet, make ashes of it, then put it into a gem of sorts. Icky pants!!

2) Fundies: The Underwear Built for Two - for obvious reasons.

3) Coffin Couch - I won't be caught within 50 feet of a hearse for fear that there's a dead body in it. I don't know if this is supposed to be some kind of modern, crazy, designer thing... but it's creepy.

4) Chanel Sandal with Lightbulb Heel - As a shoe, it's atrocious overall.

5) Fish Bowl Bookends - Bookends serve one purpose: to prevent books from falling over. They shouldn't require to be fed and cleaned.

6) Gold Pills - Might make your blood rich (pun intended!!!) but uh... gold can be like whoa toxic when it's inside your body (although it might make your poo pretty).

7) Bootbag - Literally looks like a rubber boot that someone cut handles into. Is this really supposed to be trendy in the slightest?

8) Poo Pourri - Just spray this in the toilet before you release your (gold studded) poo and the person entering the bathroom immediately afterward won't detect the slightest odor to offend their olfactory... in theory.

9) Bestow Wall-Mounted Hand Vase - A ghastly white arm that comes out of the wall and holds flowers. Quaint. And creepy. Obviously belongs on either side of the coffin couch.

10) Ticket to Heaven - What a load of crockery and a quick way to scam someone out of $12.79.

I saw the trailer for Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince today. It gave me chills. Now, all I have to do is wait til JULY to see it... *sigh*

I wanna make sangria to take home for tomorrow... dunno if my mum would appreciate that though... hrm... Here's a list of tasty looking cocktails for this holiday season!!!! Happy Thanksgiving to almost everyone!

Shrimp on treadmills

Ya know... I really could not have asked for a better boy than my Wesley.

He's level-headed, money suave, laid-back, always excited to try new things, 100% loving, a real sweet heart, thoughtful, occasionally romantic (although he won't admit it), and someone I can completely fall back on that will gently tell me when I'm acting like a psycho girlfriend and going overboard with the female crazyness.

All-in-all, a swell partner to experience life with :)

Ode to the miserable WaWa customer

I don't particularly feeling like blogging.

I just got off work and should be either doing homework, reading, sleeping, or fixing compy. I think I'll read and then sleep. In that order.

People were real dicks last night/this morning and it just made me feel really crummy. They all think I'm some kind of sociopath or have a million kids or have no ambition in life. Yeah? Fuck you too old man in the silly hat, ugly man 1, 2, 3 thru 15, fat man 1 and 2, women-who-work-at-the-elderly-home-and-smell-like-piss, Camel Light guy, 3 packs of Newport guy, DelVal security guy (you are not a real police man), and everyone who can't muster up the manners to say goodmorning to someone that has said it to you first. Fuck you. I hope you lose your jobs, your spouses leave you for someone younger and better behaved, your house burns down, your children disown you, the brake-line on your car is cut, your scalding coffee spills onto your genitals, you find a fingernail in your haogie, and your dog chews up every single pair of shoes you own (before your house has burned down). Then you'll have a reason to act like a miserable fuck towards me.

14 hours at the WaWa is a few too many

As soon as I got done typing my blog yesterday and all of Friday evening was streched out before me with endless possibilities for end-of-the-week-shenanigans... WaWa calls me and asks me if I'd be able to come in. To work. More.

I had just left that place at 7:30 and had only slept about 3 hours that day and they called at 3:30pm to see if I could come in. What do I say? Well, YES!

Not that enthusiastically of course.

I was there from 4pm to 10pm and got cheesesteak on my boots (because I went there straight from campus and didn't have sneakers... boo).

Then Wes came at 10pm to gather me and we came home and slept. Oh glorious Friday, what a terrible tease.

...Hopefully South Philadelphia Tap Room tonight... if Wes feels he won't toss it all back up into the toilet...

Oh Friday, you almost had me beat!

So... I worked last night/this morning, went to my 8am, drove home, and fell asleep. And overslept. I woke up at 2:30 and needed to be back on campus by 3:05 for calculus. This raised more than one problem.

1) the drive and walk to class are over half an hour combined
2) I hadn't looked over the test at all so knew I would be unable to ask any intelligent questions about it
3) I hadn't yet typed my EC (which I really need)
4) I still smelled like hoagie

The extra credit essay was what I was most concerned with... I drove like a demon-out-of-hell to get here, ran/clomped to class (not thinking and in my rush to get ready to run out the door I put my heavy-as-hell boots on), and marched into class nearly on-time. Everyone handed their stupid papers in... and, like some sort or mentally retarded, socially inept, general-fuck-up-in-life, I timidly asked, "Can I email you my paper?" and followed it it up with my most pathetic can-you-please-cut-me-a-break smile. She didn't say yes. She didn't say no. She just gave me that look that means she disapproves of my request to save a tree and desire to take up space in her email 'inbox' (which I made sound like I had indeed already written... just had not yet printed).

Whatever... so I drove half an hour to get to class and the fucking thing lasts ten minutes. NO LIE! Which, annoying as it was, gave me an opportunity to run to the nearest computer lab, whip up a paper (sugar coated BS), and email it to her so that she'll hopefully have it before she sits down at her desk to sip her afternoon vodka (her name is Trubnik. It's a bad Russian joke.). So now it's 3:45 and I've attended class, typed my extra credit, emailed it to her (which included a lot of groveling and whining and asking for her understanding in the matter), and now have blogged... all within the past 40 mins!! I'm ready for a nap.

Here is my most delightful extra credit essay for calculus II :

When Will I use Calculus II in my Career

-While I am not positive that I’ll ever need to use calculus in my day-to-day work within the industry, most undergraduate Food Science programs around the country require that their students take calculus II.
-In the past, I have asked my advisor why we were required to take it and the best answer he could come up with was, “Because other food science programs make kids take it.” Basically, he was admitting that he has no idea what’s going on nor why our curriculum is the way it is (which is an entirely different story), but I think I’ve come up with passable reason for this decision.
-A year ago, when I co-oped at Campbell’s Soup Company, located in Camden, NJ, I discovered that nearly everyone that worked there had a master’s degree. Whether is be in food science, business, law, food engineering, etc. Even if you come to Campbells with a mere bachelors degree, they will encourage you and pay you to complete a masters program. Unfortunately for me, I believe that this is going to become the trend within not just the food industry, but all industry’s out in the work force.
-That being said, I believe that calculus I and calculus II are required for Food Science students trying to complete a B.S. merely in order to prepare us for graduate school. It is more or less inevitable that we will be enrolling in some sort of education higher than bachelor’s so taking calculus II now will better prepare us for the more difficult science and math courses that we will encounter at graduate school.

I think it turned out rather well!!

Bad China Food, Bad!

So....

Wesley surprised me with the first season of L.A. Ink on DVD for our anniversary!!! I had completely forgotten it was out!

I decided that I take us out for dinner at The Perk. We had a good time, good food, booze, etc.

Then Wesley threw up our anniversary dinner. He had managed to pick up a foodborne pathogen from the China food he'd had for lunch and it decided that it didn't want any food in his system. So he was up all night, I was up on and off. Luckily I didn't work last night and have no classes today so I'm able to cater to my sick little man (boys are sooooo pathetic when they're sick!!!).

I made him red Jell-O so that his vomit would be pretty colors.

I have a lecture to go to this evening at school that I have to write a paper for. Wes and Matt and Andrew have tickets to go see The Eagles of Death Metal tonight... but I dunno if he's gonna make it. Poor kid :(

OH! And I got my computer working... but... CAN'T REMEMBER MY USER LOG-ON!!! I never set any passwords on my computer because I knew that I would never remember them... and now my computer is asking for this password and that password... UGH!!! Any Fixes????

Friday?!?!?!?!?!?

Did well on micro... not so sure about physics... haven't dared look at calculus. Triple ugh!

So now that that disaster is mostly over, I feel like it's Friday! We have no more legit calc classes, are almost done with speeches in speech, and only have one more test in Physics. I feel like it's the end of the semester! HOT DAMN!!!

Which means back to 3rds full-time for a month or so... of which I'll have saved no money by the end of break because of the trips home and Christmas presents. I often wonder if I'm being hypocritical in engaging in Christmas traditions as an atheist... but then I remember just that: Christmas traditions. With all the decorations and maxing out of credit cards and face-stuffing, I think very few people actually really think about why Christmas was instated and what it was originally meant to 'celebrate.' I like to spoil my friends and family and Christmas is just a manner in which to get it all out of the way at once (with the exception of Birthdays, of course!). Besides, who can help but feel happy and generous with so many smiling Santa's, elves, and snowmen everywhere? I think I will choose not to feel back-ass-ward in celebrating the traditions, and not the 'reasons,' of Christmas. Maybe someday, when I'm old and bitter and miserable, I'll decide not to partake... but I'm going to enjoy it while I can.

Today is Wes and I's two year anniversary. Two years! And we still like/tolerate/put up with each other! I find it worth mentioning, at least. I'm not sure what plans for the evening are as of yet but we are planning on going to The South Philadelphia Tap Room on Saturday and using my $50 gift certificate. What? Cop-out, you say? I beg to differ! I am a firm believer that when any one goes to a restaurant, fun increases exponentially with the amount of money that he/she spends especially when that money isn't yours. I doubt we'd have spent $50 of our own money going out because we are (generally) practical people when it comes to our money. And while we can have a good time going out for $20, spending $50 of some one elses money is a rare treat!!!

Junkie!!!!

Micro test Wednesday
Physics test Wednesday
Take home portion of Calculus test Wednesday
How/why does this always happen?

We were discussing free will and determinism today in Philosophy... to me, it seems ridiculously absurd that anyone should actually believe that his or her life is completely predetermined and no matter what they do, they don't do it by free will. Really? So... each one of my thoughts, emotions, heartbeats is predetermined? Someone is putting these thoughts and emotions into my head for me? They calculated in those 15 minutes of micro in which I completely zoned out? I highly doubt it. But, if that is the case and we are all programmed to think, feel, and act the way we do without any control over it... then somebody/something has a lot of spare time to mess around with. There's no way.

I honestly believe that people are born evil. Yup! I said it! The only reason that the general population believes that we are all born good and end up corrupted is because no one wants to be labeled an 'evil' person. But think about... if people are born evil, why doesn't the vast majority commit evil acts? Let's look at the trifecta: Murder, theft, and adultery. Say person X commits and one of these three frowned upon scenarios. When (not if) that person is caught or discovered, they get into trouble. And what happens when you get into trouble regarding those three acts? You get arrested. Spend time in jail until they figure out who's charging you with what. Pay a bail. Go in and out, in and out of court for weeks, maybe months. Get either sentenced to jail or fined out the ass (I understand that you don't get arrested for adultery, but chances are you'll still spend a lot of time in [divorce] court and will be extremely broke afterwards). So basically, getting 'in to trouble' takes up two of peoples most prized resources: their time and their money. The short of it - it's inconvenient for people to get into trouble.

Even as children, we were taught that getting into trouble meant we didn't get allowance, didn't get ice cream, had to do chores... thus taking up our time and money.

I could go on... but I don't have the patience to sit here and type my fingers to the bone... perhaps I'll revisit this on another day.

On a lighter note, I just got an email from e.l.f. about a sale they're having. If you buy bag A you get five free things to put into it, for bag B you get three, and for bag C you get one. I'm enticed! I love e.l.f. because their make-up is cheap in price but performs extremely well (I can't live without my eyebrow gel and clear mascara!!!!). There products are anywhere from $1 to $3 and they don't rape you with shipping charges. ...Maybe I'll get my sister (and myself) a bag filled with goodies for her birthday... I am, after all, a make-up junkie :)

Can't wait to leave this place

Work Friday night was pretty terrible... as to be expected.

Quite a few adults lost all dignity and came in acting like wasted 15 year olds. These were people in their 40's, maybe even 50's, that were acting like they'd never drank before. I understand that sometimes people just wanna go out with friends, however old you or they may be, and have a 'good time,' but you are adult, after all. Act it.

While I was working, Wes went out with Sean. I have complete trust and faith in Wesley but I do not like the fact that he was out drinking with Sean because I don't trust him. He habitually cheats on his girlfriend of over a year and has no sense of anyone but himself. Oh my way home from work on Saturday morning, I noticed a few pumpkins smashed in the street a couple houses down from Wes' parents house. I asked Wes if he did it, and he said, "ME!? NO! It was Sean!" Duh. I should've known. I can imagine two little kids waking up Saturday morning to the guts of their beloved pumpkins strewn all over the road in front of their house. I also think very little of Sean because he drinks to throw up. If he doesn't black out and wake up in a puddle of his own puke, it wasn't a 'good' night. Ugh. What a disgusting, conniving, idiotic example of a human. He makes me throw up in my mouth.

Last night was a blast though! We got into Philly around... 6:30ish or so. It turns out, Sam lives in a house that we've walked by dozens of times on our way to the 7-11 from Jeff's old apartment. In fact, she lives two or three house away from said 7-11!!! The house is scary as hell and she (of course) lives on the third floor which requires an adventure up three very narrow, very creaky flights of stairs.

We went to dinner at the Bubble House! Since it was still early for a Saturday, there was no wait and the place was hardly busy. I got the dumpling sampler, miso soup, and a glass of MacMurry Pinot Noir (yum!). Sam got some sort of green, toxic-looking cocktail that she said was mediocre. The boys drank Magic Hat #9. We sauntered out around 8:30 to head back up the street to the apartment. The boys went and got a case of LionsHead (ick) and Sam and I dove into my bottle of Cuvee Blush (left over from Thursday). We decided on Mad Mex for their monstrous margarita's and food specials. so at 10pm, we headed out. I got a Mango Martini: 22oz for $7!!!!! That's a lot of booze for a little buck!!! We held off on ordering food until 11 because then all apps were 1/2 price (and yes, my 22oz's of deliciousness lasted that long). Along with our chips and various dips, Sam and I ordered a carafe of the red sangria. I'm still relatively new to the sangria thing, but the spiciness of the salsa and the saltiness of the chips helped cut down on its sweetness. For their second round, Wes and Matt ordered vanilla porters... and that was the end of Matt. The chewable beer was too much for the svelte fella. Anywho, it was a great place with tons of personality and a great atmosphere. We ended up sticking around until after midnight and then headed back to the apartment for a few more drinks then bed.

This morning we did breakfast at the Philly Diner and then hit up the Art Museum.

It pained me to have to come back to this house in stupid Sellersville. Ugh.

A Crum Sort of Day

I know it's Friday... and that it's usually exciting when it's Friday... But:

1. It's dreary and dark and moist outside
2. Since I didn't work Wednesday, I work tonight. Brilliant.
3. I keep procrastinating on my work... even though I should know better.

At least I have Drexel to look forward to tomorrow and brewing to look forward to on Sunday.

Today I discovered that my unknown, which was just refered to as Unknown 6 for the past six weeks, may be Bacillus larvae. I guess it causes American foulbrood in honey bees and the spores are often found in honey (the exact reason you do not give honey to children younger than twelve months!!!). While that is mildly exciting... I was hoping for some Clostridium botulinum or Escheria Coli O157:H7 or Listeria monocytogenes. But... I got American foulbrood. Figures.

Maybe I'll abondon all attempts at doing work today and just go spend money at the Book Store on Christmas present and then have lunch by myself in the Pub while reading Brisingr. That sounds much more appealing that sitting in front of the computer.

AH!!! *angry face*

We were supposed to go out with Sean last night... but after some choice physical activity... we fell asleep and didn't wake up til after 1am. Oops :/

Needless to say, we didn't make it out for a drink but my night off was still pleasant. Got a good way through my new book, Brisingr by Christopher Paolini (the third [but not last!!!!] in the Inheritance Cycle). It was originally the Inheritance Trilogy but apparently he didn't get it all out in three books so they're gonna keep on coming! I love this author. He was 15 when he wrote his first draft of Eragon, revised it a year later and published a year after that. Brilliant! Makes me wanna get more dragon tattoo's *smiles sheepishly*

I intended to get a lot done today... but I'm really enjoying a day with the house to myself and not being exhausted from work. For some reason though, I have The View on in the background... quite possibley the worst TV host show ever. Ever. Worst demonstration of woman-power in history.

Zach is acting his typical little bitch self this week... towards me. In calculus on monday this conversation took place:

Zach: (to Jamie and I) I don't get this... (to teacher) Can you explain that again?
Teacher: *gab gab gab* I make no sense *gab gab gab*
Jamie: (to teacher) So... we can just multiply them and they're the same? dxdy is the same as dydx?
Teacher: *gab gab gab* I make no sense *gab gab gab*
Me: OH! I get it! (to Zach and Jamie) *explains*
Jamie and Zach: Ooooooooooooh, ok.
Me: See! It's easy!

Apperantly when I said, See! It's easy!, I offened Zach to the n'th degree. So I'm unaware that I've done anything even remotely offensive because Jamie isn't upset about the comment and I obviously meant nothing by it. I didn't find out that Zach was being a priss until Wednesday morning in Micro and I said something to him and he turns around and feeds me,

Zach: No, but I was offended when you called me stupid the other day!
Me: What are you talking about? *with the WTF face*
Zach: In calculus, you called me stupid!
Me: Ummm... no... I didn't? When did I say that?

So obviously there is nothing going on in Zach's life so he feels me saying, "see, it's easy" is worth getting upset about and stewing over and creating a fight about. Whatever. Get your fucking 12-year old girl drama out of my fucking life. He told Lynette the 'atrocity' I committed against him and ended with, "She didn't even know she offended me," and Lynette, a voice of reason, said, "then forget about it!!!!"

After this post, I'm through being concerned about it. If you wanna act like a little prissy fucking bitch who can do no wrong and whom everyone should bow before and accept unquestiongly, then more power to you. You're a self pitying, whining, pathetic faggot and I'm tired of it. I have better things to concern myself with.

On a lighter note:
I've been thoroughly disappointed with the persuasive speeches that have been delivered in speech. None of them are... controversial. There was one, I believe, in which a girl argued against the death penalty... but the rest are like "Join Scouts!," "Eat Banana's!," "Don't Hunt Wolves from Helicopters!" I think I'm going to do mine on Atheism although I'm not sure from what direction just yet. Probably something retarded like, "Atheist's are 'Good' People too," and discuss some of the misconceptions surrounding atheists and their beliefs... or lack there of. Or maybe I'll really get some people worked up with "ATHEISM IS THE PATH TO SANITY AND RATIONALITY!"

Quick thoughts

I don't feel like blerging today... or yesterday... or the day before yesterday...

Wes and I's portraits still took place even though it was crummy outsite on Saturday. Our friend Sam is working on her senior thesis for photography from Drexel. She's photographing couples. It was a lot of fun!!!

After pictures, we proceded to eat dinner and then drink vast amounts of wine and beer.

Got a 100% on my physics test! Still two more tests this semester... would like to do very well on them as well.

There are only three and half weeks of class left, with a half a week of vaca for Turkey Day... then a week of finals. All my finals are either Thursday, Friday, or Saturday (Calc II... 8am... UGH!).

Going tonight to look at the camera I think I want for Christmas. I've only read reviews about it online (all good) so I'm gonna go for some hands-on tonight. It's a Nikon D60... a dSLR camera!!!!!

Annnnd going out to celebrate Sean's 21st birthday tomorrow at midnight. How ironic that almost as soon as he moves back in with his mother he turns 21. I think he planned it that way... This will be the first time in a long time we've hung out with Sean even though he's only ever lived 5 minutes away. His apartment was seriously gross and he was always working. That's what I'll attribute our time apart to.

Beer and Cheese

I considered my week to be over Wednesday afternoon after my much dreaded (but pleasantly easy!!!!) physics test. I had work and the rest of my classes for the week, sure, but as far as homework or tests or quizes or papers were concerned, my week was finished then.

I'm glad it's finally Friday so that I can celebrate Friday!

Senior portrait today and another $15 the school is getting from me! I was going back forth between either coming to my 8am, driving back to the house, getting ready there and then driving back to campus or just getting up early, showering, and bringing everything I needed to get ready for my picture. In the spirit of not wanting to waste an hour of my day and another gallon of gas, I decided to bring my face-wash, lotion, powder, and assortment of eye make-up with me. My picture isn't until 2:30 so I have plenty of time to do a little bit of work and dick around on the internet before getting ready.

Tomorrow Wes and I are getting our pictures taken for a project of a friend of ours. I'm not sure if it's a couple-thing or an abstract thing or how it's going to go... but I'm excited. It's not that I'm vain, I just like having my picture taken!!!!

I know it's still early to be thinking about Christmas but the 2 liter Coke bottles at work already have Santa Clause on them... So I can't but begin to wonder what I want to get people for Christmas. I found some really unique (but not ugly) necklaces in the vintage store at Doylestown Underground a couple of weeks ago and think they would make fantastic presents for my mum and sister. Unfortunately, my sister's birthday is two weeks before Christmas so I have to do her bday shopping too. I'm thinking maybe a vest or something from Old Navy (50% off for card holders!!!!!). My brother says he wants money. Pft. Lame. I never know what to get my dad. Probably a book. I'm going to get Wes a tattoo gun so that he can start tattooing me (WAHAHAHAHAHAHA) and we'll probably get the default gift card to the Washington House for his parents. Not sure what to get Andrea... maybe some wine glasses if she hasn't already gotten some. I know she had said to me before that she was getting into wine but had nothing to drink it out of (because it just doesn't taste as good from a regular glass).

Wes and I are making two or three batches of beer to give out too I think. A winter warmer and something else... I forget. Making beer for gifts kills two birds with one stone though: I'm doing a presentation for my honors class on beer making and taking in some samples!!! I wanted to try to do some home-made cheese to go along with our beer gifts, but I don't know if that's going to get done or not. Bummer :(

It makes me sad that this year Wes and I won't have our own tree with our presents under it. I miss having our own place...

Since I'll be home for Thanksgiving, maybe my mum, sister, and I will venture out early on Black Friday. Super fun!

The sound of one-hand clapping

I've decided to become a Zen Buddhist. They believe in nature and self and enlightenment. Not fairy tales of men in the sky, spying on everyone and interfering with life when bored. I like it!

I had an epiphany yesterday!!
Yesterday was our third physics test. I've done really poorly on the first two (I hate seeing C's) so the pressure is really on to begin doing well (even though I should began 3 months ago!). So I studied, studied, studied... as I've done for the past two.

The epiphany happened during the test. I finished it and walked up to hand it in. "I'm worried..." I said the professor. "WHY!?" he practically yells. "Because I knew how to do everything!!!!" I yell back! That feeling is terrible... you feel that since you think you know what you're doing, you're doing it wrong... Hopefully that's not the case and something finally has just clicked and I'll become a world-reknowned phycisist and create annoying equations and physics scenario's of my own for poor college students to sweat over. That would be brilliant!!!

Some guy at work last night engaged me in conversation which is not unusual. What was unusual was that after he got done asking me about my boat and my car and what not, this question comes out of his mouth:

Desparate Guy: Working third shift must really cut into your social life
Me: Sometimes, it's not too bad though
DG: You have any kids?
Me (slightly confused at where this is going): What? Me? NO!
DG: You have a boyfriend?
Me: YES!
DG: You do? Then why are you working?
Me: For money?
DG: Yeah, I suppose. So you're not into that whole house-wife thing?
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! no.

Basically, what I got from this conversation was that this guy goes around and hassles any female that works third shift (like him). He assumes that since they're working third shift they have 3 kids and no man. He was genuinely thrown when he discovered that I had a boyfriend and was working. I can't make my own money? Bizzare.

While grocery shopping for my weekly family-dinner-concoction last night (Shepards Pie with pork), I really missed living in Gwyned. One of my fondest memories (for real) about living there was Wes and I's weekly grocery store expeditions. I don't know why... It just made me feel all warm and fuzzy, adventurous, and loved.

I have a love/hate relationship with infomercials. I'm really tired so it's more of a hate relationship right now.

Senior picture tomorrow!! I think I'm gonna go curly!

Election '08

It's 2008.

It appalls me the amount of 'anti gay-marriage' propositions people are 'voting' on today.

Of course I'm keeping an eye on the election, but the bottom of the screen just keeps scrolling state after state after state that are voting to BAN gay-marriage.

IT'S FUCKING 2008!!!

I can't wrap my mind around the fact that gay-marriage is even a concern. I don't care if it's "against your religion!" Find a new fucking god if that your biggest basis for support!

Making it illegal for gays and homosexuals to get married is meddlesome and unnecessary. It is discriminatory and ignorant. I just wanna grab anyone by the shoulders that thinks that by banning gay marriage they're making the US a better place, shake the fuck out of them, and yell "MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS!"

I can't express in words how distraught I am that gay-marriage, women's right (pro choice), and stem cell research are even topics of debate. It's 2008!!!! Get with the picture!

Yes to allow gays to marry!
Yes to allow a woman to the right to her body!
Yes to stem cell research!

Fucking heathen, white trash, prude, Bible fucking, egotistical fucking maniacs. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

...and that's why I voted Obama. *Crackers for Obama* read one of my customers shirts! Brilliant!

A Milestone!

Today, ladies and gentleman, I registered for classes for the last time as an undergraduate!!!!!

I think my Mum had been more excited than I was leading up to this point but now that I look at my 'program evaluation' and see "remaing credits: 2" (taking into consider a class is still on my evalaution that I don't have to take and the fact that I haven't gotten my employment program credits, 4, nor my cultural enrichment credits, 2) I'm on the verge of peeing my pants (with excitement, of course)!!!!

Next semester should be a breeze with a mere 16 credits. And, if I'm feeling particularly bumish, I might even drop a class and have a pathetic 13 credits!!! Now I'm squirming with excitement. It almost makes this semester feel less overbearing (even though this is the worst I've done throughout my entire schooling career) and I think I can see the light at the end of the tunnel...

Now, if only there were any jobs out there in the work-force!!!!

November? Really?

darn... I came downstairs to sit on the computer for 5 mins and it's too late... ugh. Now I have to sit down here for a couple hours before it's safe to go upstairs... (exaggeration).

Work was blech. I worked with Shawn which I was initially excited about... but he's such a strange guy. He'll tell you something completely ridiculous and think it's funny but if you say something ridiculous, he takes it too literally and makes a big production of nothing.

Case and point:
ME: Shawn, I wanna drink his (teeny magazine heart throb boy) bathwater!
SHAWN: Oh! Ew! UGH! That makes me wants to vomit! That's disturbing!

... But you'll go for three days an not shower? That's not disturbing?

On the plus, I get an hour of OT because of the clocks turning back at 2 this morning (it was painful to relive the 1am-2am period of time). Oh, and a guy came in last night dressed as The Joker in the nurses uniform. It worries me how good he looked wearing a tiny dress. I think he was just a swell looking fella... under all that running make-up.

Parlez-vous anglais?

Parce-que je parle francias seulement un peu!!!

(not sure if my placememnt of 'seulement' is correct...)

Drank a bottle and a half of wine last night while watching Tim Burtons The Nightmare Before Christmas and The Corpse Bride (because Sideways and Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason have dissappeared *angry face*), texted everyone in my contact list, and tried to stay up as late as possible. Everyone was busy partying so texting was fruitless and I only made it to 1:30 before I got bored of being the only person I had to hang out with.

I think I might do my persuasive speech on languages and how American's should take some time out of their extremely imporant lives to learn a second language, even if only it's just the basics.

Bonjour!
Comment t'appelle-tu?
Donnez-moi une bouteille de vin rouge, s'il vous plait!!
Où est...?
Je ne comprend pas!
Je suis très fatigue...
C'est combien?
A quelle heure?
C'est la vie!
Le poulet s'il vous plait!

That's all you really need to know... for realz. Très oui!

I wanna get married. Another couple Wes and I know who've been together for six or more years, married for three of those years, have ended it... we think. Where as the heaviest guy on earth just got married.

I hate everyone.

I'm going to go finish my wine and do my calculus. A winning combination.

Just winning isn't enough...

I dislike how everyone is calling the Phillies the "world champions."

They're the one team that has beaten all the other teams in the United States... NOT all the other teams in the world.

Arrogant mother fuckers.

I just want to sleep and not think

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

I took my poor compy to the computer people on campus today and they didn't give me much good news. I need to either call Lenovo or look online for the restore disks for my ThinkPad... I think that the only way to fix her is to start from scratch.

I have a twitch in my eyelid that's been going for a couple hours now... I'm sure it was one of these instances that triggered it
1. I woke up late this morning
2. The discussion of the poor state of my computer
3. Realizing that I have the in-class part of my calc today
4. This weekend is going to be pretty bum
5. I just don't care about school

I'm realizing more and more why people drop out of school so that they can work... and get on with things already. I'm tired of festering in that house. It smells like a toilet, the fucking TV is always on (whether or not someone is there watching it), the word "god" stares at me from the fridge, the walls and the bathroom mirror, the constant glaring, there's never anything remotely healthy to eat, and I just plain ole don't feel comfortable being there or having people over.

Wah wah wah. I know.

Usually I find refuge in our room upstairs but with my computer currently out of commission, that's going to be difficult this weekend. I'm going to have to make my presence downstairs and walk through the negative tension filling the 'house' to get to the other computer which, conveniently, is located in the basement. Big deal? Well, for some reason the heater in the basement is on full-blast and there always seems to be a mysterious pile of shit (or two, or three) directly under this inferno. Now, poo smells bad; really, really HOT poo smells even worse. There are vomit stains all over the carpet and couch because the cat is sick (and Wes' parents refuse to take it to the vet). To sum it up, it's a glorious place to spend any amount of time!

I don't think I'm feeling sorry for myself... I'm just fascinated that people choose to live this way. It's filthy and makes me want to add to the vomit stains.

Hopefully I'll hear from Dan and Julie and they'll save me from the bowels of the library and add to my calculus procrastination.

"I got engaged last night and didn't even care!"

That's what a woman said this morning when she called into Preston and Steve to tell her Phils story.

That poor schmuck. He waited until after the Phils had won to propose to this women. She was so excited about the Phils winning, that when he asked her, she said, "SURE WHATEVER GO PHILS!"

That's one for the grandchildren.

I'm sleepy and cranky from last night. Other people's enthusiasm for the game just made me grumpy. I was bummed that I didn't get to partake in the festivities and had missed the final innings because of my pre-work nap and didn't get to go out and pretend to be a huge Phils Phan and get retarded and make an ass of myself (ok, ok... that last part is definitely not something I feel that I missed out on). But seriously, I'd just gotten to work, Gene called out and I was stuck with failure-at-life Justin, I'd missed everything, I couldn't play with everyone else, and I don't particularly care about baseball (I think I was just in a extremely bitter mood about the whole thing). Fake enthusiasm is extremely transparent so I faked idiocy instead.

Phan: GO PHILS!! WOOOOOO!
Me: Phils played tonight?
Phan: YEAH!!! THEY WON!!!!
Me: Oh great! Football right?

Everyone was smashed and didn't hear anything I said anyway. Might as well make the situation entertaining for myself.

I'm just glad they won, it's over, Philly is happy. Buy a newspaper ladies and gentleman, it might just be another 28 years!

No title necessary

Physics test next Wednesday and Calculus test this week. Double ugh and hopefully not two more C's.

Even though I persistantly asked Wes everyday for about two weeks if he wanted to go to Penn State with Jeff this weekend, I couldn't get an answer and if I did, it was in the negative. Soooooo... I asked to work on Saturday (which is going to screw me either way because Saturday at 2am is when the clocks get turned back an hour so I'm assuming that I work a 9 hour shift instead of a regular 8 hour) and of course... today Wes says he wants to go to Penn State. Figures.

I quit.

It was bound to happen

Not having antivirus on my computer has finally caught up with me... and my poor little baby is in not-so-good-of-shape. Hopefully I'll be able to take it to the IT department of campus and they'll fix her like new... for free.

Problems arose when I was tired of all these stupid pop-ups from windows security and Norton internet security about how many infections I had blah blah blah. So I tried upgrading either of those... didn't work (for some reason neither my safari nor my internet explorer would load the pages) so I did some research (read: googled) about top rated antiviruses and picked the highest rated cheap one. Fool proof, right?

I bought it, it god sent to my email, I was ready for download. Oooooof course until I found out that I couldn't download my new one until I got rid of Norton... which, upon investigating... is nearly impossible. Norton has made their program such that you can't remove it without ruining something. So... I don't know what I did... I backed up all my music and documents and other important things onto my external hard drive though... so... even if it does go bonkers, I won't lose everything.

I downloaded a Restore and Recovery program from Lenovo for IBM thinkpads... but so far that hasn't accomplished anything...

I'm hungry and ready to be done with school.

EEEEEEEEEEEE *squeals of excitement*

Even though work was icky and physics lab was a drag, I am in a good mood...

CUZ IT'S SNOWING!!!

Nothing else needs to happen today for it to be a good one :)

It feels like a Monday... oh wait!...

Today wasn't bad, I was just in a bad mood.  

I got my Philosophy test and while I didn't think I had done terribly well, I hadn't planned on doing that poorly.  So now... the decision must be made whether to try and spend more time on homework or admit defeat and just drop the class.  I would feel like a failure if I dropped the class... but I cannot afford two B's this semester and am going to be working my butt of just to get one of those B's (I hate you physics.  I hope you die.).  I'll have to email my philosophy professor and inquire as to whether my pathetic grade could possibly, in a million trillion years be brought up to an A.

I was excited for the post-test classes in Philosophy because we were scheduled to begin God and how his fairy tale fits into everything, philosophically speaking, but all it did was give me a headache.  These philosophers, arguably some of the most intelligent people ever throughout history, come up with rationalities for God that a 5 year old would scoff at.  

"There must be something more perfect than man to have created man and told him what perfection was.  That being cannot be a normal man.  Therefore, God exists."

Ironic how that "rationality" reminds of someone else I deal with on a day to day basis who speaks just as irrationally... Religion is a joke, fools.

The only thing I had on my mind today was getting home and unwrapping the deliciousness that was the leftovers of my buffalo chicken cheesesteak from last night.  From class one through class five, all I could think about was the tangy buffalo sauce numbing my lips and the chicken-cheese mixture that tastes so good going down and not-so-good ten minutes later.  I literally seriously considered skipping a class to drive to the house to get it (only an hour out of my way).  But I'm glad I waited and it was everything I had built it up to be... and possibly more.  I only wish that I'd saved the entire thing last night instead of just half.

Work tonight.  Its gonna suck.  Especially if those god damn Phils win.  

"GO PHILS! I'M WASTED!!!!!" is how the night is going to sound.  Not too super excited about that... but maybe it'll keep the night interesting.  Maybe I'll get to yell or kick someone out.  That would make it worth it.

Things to do after class tomorrow:

GET A HAIRCUT

Get an oil change

Maybe color my hair... if I'm feeling not-exhausted.

There's a party going on at a place called The Puck in Dtown tomorrow... haven't looked too far into it, but it might be something to do ($0.50 mixed drinks? hellooooo!!!).  Hopefully something fantastic comes up for Friday night so that I have something to look forward to...

Neon Road Pizza!!!!

I haaaate Sunday's.  Nothing good comes from a Sunday.

We got to Jeff's early Friday night for pizza and to get everyone ready for the party (Kyle and I had to do his joker make-up).  It was chilled and relaxed but as soon as the door opened at ten, chaos ensued.  We staked out a spot on the deck near the door at the top of the steps so that we could  see the costumes that came up and kinda monitor the going's on.  

As we're standing there and more and more people are coming up and essentially no one is going down, I begin to wonder how the newspaper headline would read, "5 Killed and Dozens Injured when 2nd Story Deck Collapses Under Weight of Too Many Drunk Kids."  I told myself that since we were standing on the edge of the deck a collapse in the middle would leave us on top of the pile of inebriate bodies and that we'd be OK.

Before too long there were too many people upstairs, so Wes and I decided to explore and scope out some more costumes.  We ended up downstairs for a bit (where Mystique was giving me the heebie jeebies), chatted, etc., then decided to try and find Kyle and the others.  Even though the hoards of incoherent drunks were becoming too much to handle, we had Jeff's apartment to find refuge in, take a breather, have another slice of pizza, and refill our not-icky-miller-light drinks (since the boys paid, they drank some icky beer, but mostly stuck to jager and blackhaus).

The popo showed up, but it was only to move along the people that were loitering outside.  They had been called in because some drunk girl fell on her face and hurt herself.  Most of the people had cleared out by then so there were only some stragglers.  The police didn't give anyone any trouble.

The boys made a couple of runs to the Sev and we all went to bed around 3.  Nothing terribley exciting happened, but it was fun to dress up and hang out with everyone.

Last night Wes and I went to Matt's for dinner and pie (see photo here!).  Manicotti with TONS of spinach (Sam is a vegetarian that cooks awesome, tasty food) and the apple pie with Edy's half-the-fat caramel ice cream.  I took what was left of my magnum bottle of wine ( 1.5L Redwood Creek Pinot Grigio) from Friday and Wes and Matt bought a case of St. Pauli Girl.  We watched Interview with a Vampire with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise.  It was a spectacularly laid back and enjoyable evening.

I wanna go for a walk up at the lake today  but I gotta work on getting the boy up first!

P.S.

     Max Payne was a terrible movie.  Don't waste your money.

Why yes! I will have the sex, please.

Last night was a great success and Wes and I's costumes are finished and pretty super awesome. As a couple, we don't match in the slightest, but our individual looks are pretty dead-on! yayayayayayay! Also, I get to bleach Kyles hair this afternoon!! So much excitement!

I got the invite yesterday for the party that we're going to tonight... and saw that over 400 people had been sent invitations! So far only 90 have confirmed and assuming they bring people that weren't invited/haven't been accounted for I guesstimate a lot of people. I like small social gatherings, but I am uncomfortable at huge parties with a butt-ton of people I don't know. I don't trust them. Hopefully, since neither me nor any of my party plan on drinking the 'beer' being supplied, we'll be able to avoid the crowds collected around the kegs. Also, hopefully it's not too super cold outside (yeah, right) so we can hang out on the deck, drinking and smoking the night away.

I should be doing work while on campus and not in class, but I got an email with a code for 25% off any Victoria's Secret shirt/top so I'm browsing the 19 pages of torso attire, looking for something decent that I'd like to spend money on.

I only wish that I would look as good in their shirts as their waify models do. I ate a salad today and, me being me, I know how bad salads can be for you after you add cheese, bacon bits, croutons, and pour on the dressing but out of curiosity today I looked at the nutrition info on this particular salad: 750 calories!!! The five croutons, sprinkle of cheese, and two pieces of pop-corn chicken have been misleading me all semester!!! Luckily, I use my fave fat-free honey dijon dressing (a mere 60 cals for 1oz.) so it didn't add too much to the damage, but daaaaaamn. That's the last time I eat you, salad!

I just read an article about this "contest" that someone set-up to which no takers have signed up for, yet. For an engaged couple who haven't had premarital sex, they would receive $10,000 and free flowers and invitations for their wedding. As much as $10,000 would be appreciated, I'd rather know that I'm marrying someone I'm compatible with sexually than waiting to find out after I've already committed my life to them.

There's so much I should be doing... but I'm ready for the week to end. Maybe I'll just skip calc and call it a day...

**Oh crumb... My Philosophy teacher just emailed me and I have to make up my test at two this afternoon... bugger!!

Lingo Update

The more I think about Officer Lingo and the recent events, I can't help but wonder what his last minutes were like.

A few important things to mention; he had just worked eight hour shifts, back to back, at two different jobs, he was in the bathroom when he shot himself, and his daughters, both younger than 13, were the ones that found him.

Being busy and stretched too thin and feeling out of control of your life can bring you down fast.  Real fast.  Lingo had three jobs, as far as I know, and still could not afford to move out of the house while, I imagine, paying his ex a ton of money.  

The fact that he killed himself in the bathroom suggests to me that he was looking at himself in the mirror.  Hard.  Deciding.  Maybe with a calmness knowing that all his problems were about the be blown away or with the trembling, terrified hands or someone that can't believe they are seriously considering taking their own life and leaving loved ones behind.  

Worst of all though, his daughters finding him.  From what I know, their mother had just dropped them off, they went running into the house yelling, "Daddy! Daddy!" and ran straight into that mess.  I'm not certain what happened after that; whether the mother had taken off as soon as the girls went into the house or if she had walked them in... I don't know.  Either way, those girls are going to be fucked up for the rest of their lives.

It bothers me that Lingo felt this was the best, or perhaps only, way to deal with his problems.  He adored his girls.  I know he did.  He taught me their secret father-daughter hand shake and always spoke so affectionately of them.  I would hope that he wasn't expecting them to find him first.

I can't get this out of my head.  He is the first person that I knew to commit suicide.  I've been lucky in that there has been very little death around me.  My great aunt and uncle passed away some years ago, as did my fathers parents, but I wasn't necessarily very close to any of them so I felt removed.  I liked Lingo.  I enjoyed his company.  I felt safe being at WaWa at 3am when all the weird-o's and crazies are out.  He was there just this past Friday (I, unfortunately, was not) trying to sort out some mental guy.

It just boggles my mind.  Befuddles me.  And makes me wish I had hugged him and let him know that there were always people around that cared.

No more Lingo

As soon as I began my Micro test this morning, I received a text.  I had to let it buzz and buzz in my pocket for the duration of the test.  As soon as I leave the room I pull out my phone and see that Gene sent me a text.

"Lingo killed himself."

Lingo was an awesome Dtown police officer that frequented the WaWa when he was on thirds.  A super great guy going through a messy divorce.  His ex was making it much more difficult than divorce already is.  She wanted the house, the dog, the money.

He had two young daughters.

It was selfish of him to take his life.

Unrelated, I'm starting a second blog: 365 - A Year in Pictures.  I've seen this around the blogging community and think it's a swell idea.  It looks really lame right now because I can't decide what my first photo should be.  Unfortunately I have none of the Lingo.

Mr Potato Head Face

I think my parents dressed me up in the Mr Potato Head accessories and took a picture knowing that they could someday use the images against me. Jerks.

Your Sex is on Fire

I don't know why MMR is in love with this stupid song and why they play it so much... but it irritates me.

It seems that I have a lot I would like to write about... but I don't feel like staring at my computer screen and composing a tome while eating terrible spaghetti.  I'm actually excited for my pre-work-nap tonight because, honestly, today was kinda not so good.

Firstly, I have been considering, much to the disappointment of myself, dropping Philosophy.  In previous semesters, I was able to take a full-load of credits and work and be social while still maintaining my GPA.  This semester though is kicking my butt.  Generally I can pay attention in class, take notes, and be generally well-off for tests and what-not... but this semester is requiring a lot of time that I'm not used to putting into classes.  For once, I'm not understanding math and science courses by mental osmosis (the teachers words putting themselves into my head) and thus, I'm scrambling to get ready for tests and forgetting about homework... even though I have been extremely diligent this year about writing everything down into my planner thingy.

So, to return back to my original thought, if this weeks Philosophy test does not go in my favor I am going to suck it up and withdraw from it, the only class I actually enjoy this semester.  While is it a course I need for graduation, I have already made room in my schedule for next semester to include Psychology which would then take the place of Philosophy.  I discussed my options with the professor and he was very understanding and said that if I did decide to drop the class, that I was more than welcome to still attend :)

Dan's daughter, Emma, was sick today so he played hooky which meant that I was stuck listening to Zach for the entirety of Microbiology (which was a waste of my time anyway).  

That girl interest of his that I was so upset about a couple of weeks ago has indeed broken up with her boyfriend.  AND is interested in someone other than Zach.  Zach feels he's been shafted (although why, I don't know) by this chick.  I could care less.

After micro came the dreaded Physics test.  Now, keep in mind that the last Physics test was the one on which Zach scored one point higher than I did so when, half an hour into the test, he gets up and hands his test in, I can't help but think to myself, "AGAIN! What does this kid know that I don't!?!?"  I use the remaining hour to finish my test (3 problems of which I was ready for, 2 of which I was only half ready for).  Afterwards, Lynette and I were discussing the test in Speech and she says something about Zach taking his test up so quickly.  So, of course, I text him to find out what happened and he literally says, "I forgot everything, I knew I failed, I'm going to take it as my lowest test grade and drop it."  OOPS.  Guess his 3x5 index card was lacking.  Or it might be that he doesn't have the book.

My speech today was much better than my disaster-of-a-speech from a couple of weeks ago.  Wes helped me practice yesterday and told me what I was doing wrong.  It helped me keep my speech to around the ideal five minute mark and keep it interesting but still informative.  AND he took care of laundry while I sweated over physics.  He's such a wonderful boy (he pacified me Saturday night too when I was all woman crazy about trying to fit someone's abandoned armchair into his tiny car.  It ultimately didn't work, but we tried!).

Work tonight.  Hopefully I'll have some time to start looking over micro since it's not a championship game tonight.  I'm going to try and pick up at least one more, maybe two more, night shifts since Xmas is not that far and I love, love, LOVE buying gifts for people.  While we were in Dtown Saturday night, we found a little vintage shop that had a lot of quite lovely jewelry.  I found a couple of things that I think my mum and sister would like.

Speaking of sister, she got her tongue pierced.   On Friday.  Without me!  Now I must get mine done!!!!  

Halloween party at Jeffrey's on Friday.  I have a couple of options for costumes.  Most probable right now is the giant purple sheet I bought at the Goodwill that is going to be made into a Toga.  Maybe.  Best of all, I get to make Wesley a tutu!!!! WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!